Attention young adult: Buy this automobile

Car commercials have been a staple of television advertising for as long as I can remember. The new coupe racing around alpine turns, mom taking the kids to soccer practice, slicked down pavement (or easily surmountable rock formations), definitely no other cars in sight.

If you put two and two together, these cliched scenes tell you something about the audience the advertiser is trying to reach.

Hairpin turns – you’re a regular Michael Schumacher. So what if you can’t change your own oil? You want precision engineering, or something.

Off-roading – you’re a weekend warrior who might (but probably won’t) ever take your car actually off of a road.

Loading up groceries – your car is a family mobile, safety, safety, safety.

and so on…

But there’s a new kind of car commercial that has surfaced in recent years. Car makers and advertisers are increasingly going after a younger market. They’re selling entry-level “cool” cars to young working types – cars like the Honda Fit, Mini, Scion xB, Ford Fiesta, Toyota Matrix, Nissan Cube … you catch my drift (or draft). And so, just like the other cliches that have come before it, carmakers and advertisers are attempting to capture the essence of what it means to be a cool young person.

Here are the components of a young adult car commercial:

Music. You’re dead in the water if your commercial doesn’t have a cool song that 1-in-3 young people haven’t heard yet. Otherwise, how are they going to Shazam it and add it to Spotify? It should definitely be alternative, probably indie, dub-step if you think people have robot ears. This song should ideally highlight the thumping sound system in the car. Coincidentally this has turned into a way for musicians to make it big, but that’s a story for another day.

Racially diverse friend group. This is true of most commercials but especially true here. Everyone can be the same age but there’s definitely a two white person limit. Also, be sure that the number of people in the friend group never exceeds the capacity of the car. These hip youngsters should wear funky hats and blazers to give the impression that they both work hard and play hard. Stylish horn-rimmed glasses don’t hurt either.

Dancing. Dancing is always good, upper-body dancing in the car is better – preferably to the aforementioned music. Generally, dancing is the easiest way to show that a car is nonstop fun and hijinks.

Creative event. This is key. Young people always go to creative events in hard to find places. This could be a rave with giant inflatable animals, projecting laser horses in the forest, or a pool party in a public fountain. Whatever it is, it should be the sort of thing that would get a lot of Likes on Facebook.

I guess what I’m getting at is that these commercials are the same thing as the mom in a minivan commercials. They’re trying to say “I understand you.” The problem is it comes off as extremely transparent. The good car commercials don’t get caught up in personas and demographics and psychographics. They’re just good commercials.

exhibit a

It seems you’ve come to the end of the article. Good on you. Next you should read about how your brand probably sucks.