Snow Leopard: Apple and the feline kingdom

In 2001, . If college kids think wildcats are cool, Apple is bound to be within earshot.

Lion: You would have to imagine that at some point, Apple would turn to the king of the jungle. The problem is, you can’t just name any operating system upgrade after a lion. Do you know what happens when you piss off lions? I can’t say for certain, but I’m sure it involves thrashing, eviscerating and not living to talk about it. Maybe since ‘lion’ is so close to l-ion (lithium ion), it might be a better name for the battery to rule all batteries. Apple can make one of those, right?

Cougar: The cougar, which is actually a puma, is also an option—unless you’re talking about that 40 year old at the end of the bar with the smoky eye shadow. You should probably stay away from her.

Lesser-known cats: If Apple really wanted to test the limits of the feline family, they could consider employing ocelots, margays, caracals or servals. While these cats rarely venture into the business world, Apple has a lot of sway and might be able to coax them out of the bushes.

House cats: While they’re cute and might enjoy playing with the box that an operating system comes in, house cats have clearly found their niche on YouTube. They have about as much celebrity status as all of the other cats combined which is probably why their agent won’t return any of my calls.